Wednesday, August 19, 2009

$10,499

It's been too long since I've posted anything. I've had blog worthy events occur in my life but I'm too tired to write about them now. I just stopped by for a quickie post to share some amazing/miserable news. Last night I added up how much money I've put towards my credit card debt so far in 2009; the grand total is $10,499! I'm both amazed that I've been able to pay that much in just 9 months :) and miserable that I put myself in a position that requires me to do so in the first place. :( OMG, think of the things I can do be doing with that money! OMG, I'm so proud that I finally grew up and took control of my finances!

Losing debt is so similar to losing weight. When I was overweight, it's like I had a filter that distorted the picture I had of myself. I didn't see fat, I just saw me. I got so used to seeing myself overweight that I able to ignore the fat. The same thing with debt. I got so used to seeing the large numbers, that after awhile it just didn't register how bad it was. The thing is, these filters were only about 95% effective because there was always a little nagging voice that reminded me something wasn't quite right. "Hmmm, I'm not sure my stomach is supposed to be resting on my thighs." "Umm, five figure credit card debt seems just a little out of line..." Thank god for that 5% or I'd still be a fat chick blindly racking up credit card debt.

The problem with losing debt is, it isn't as obvious as losing weight. One of the things that kept me motivated to keep losing weight was the incredible support I received from family, friends and coworkers. Unless someone is living in poverty, debt and especially the elimination of debt isn't obvious to anyone. Also, for whatever reason, it seems like some people are more uncomfortable talking about finances even if it's not about their own. Why is it that it's socially acceptable to lose weight but not debt? In most cases the person created their own problem (overweight/debt) but losing one is embraced but losing the other is more taboo. Perhaps because being overweight is more obvious than being in debt, people are forced to confront it. There's no way to hide the fat, whereas debt can be hidden. Perhaps the secretive aspect of gaining debt carries over into it's elimination. Hmmm, that went off in a direction I hadn't planned. Anywho, the truth is, I DO have support for my debt elimination. It's from a great group of women on the WIR message boards. They are all going through what I'm going through in some form or another. We come together in our virtual worlds to discuss what we can't discuss in our real lives. It would just be nice if the $10,499 I've paid would show up as baggy pants so I could walk down the hall at work and have a coworker exclaim "Damn girl, have you lost some debt? You look great!" :)